Wednesday, January 26, 2011

meaningful waiting

Looking over the desk I see a blank white wall.
It's inspiring... it says nothing. Accept, maybe,
it does, display something. Solitude. Quite light
bouncing off it... onto my desk top to cause
me a dim comfort that reflects might.
I might or might not write clarity, however, it
eventually becomes clear over time.
Tiny person next to me in her tiny desk colors
and watches tiny cartoons, only to giggle and look
at me on the silly parts. Her face and tiny giggle
make me giggle a little.
My notebook waits for my instructions for the day,
I wait on my brain to move my hand to write them.
A lot of meaningful waiting happens in this hour...
exciting thoughts for the day to come, build, and require
somewhat restraint to not smile to quickly. But it
occurs from time to time without my notice...
But as it does, my mouth, smiles, and my eyes narrow and
take in my hope from the living around me.
Not much outwardly happens at this hour, but inwardly
I spin with joy and reflection and somewhat new
perceptions reach my spirit and bring my mind into
submission. I pray not one thought of inspiration
passes my ear lobes. I wanna take it all in.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Sweet morning light

When I tiptoe down the stairs I think that I am not heard,
but then I wonder how much I'm heard.
The children kind of wrestle at times when I sneak by
their bedroom. Maybe they feel me looking in on them
before I trot down to enjoy the Word, coffee and some
writing slash planning time. I like this time. For some
reason, though, I like to tiptoe passed them. They are just
so sweet when they sleep. Especially Justice who usually
has his tiny bottom in the air with face squashed to the
bed and arms flat with palms upward. Cute sight. Kylie
is usually sprawled out holding blanky in a ninja position,
with relaxed face, contently breathing.
It's dark at this time so I have to squint to see them.
It's dark, almost, as dark as can be, yet during this time, little by
little I get enlightened within :)
When my children wake I get tickled at their scrunched up
faces and sometimes half sleepy voices... most of the
time, Kylie shoots outta bed. Justice not so much, give
him a few years or a few months :) I feed them and we go
make the beds...then we dance and sing and jump around
(me not so much these days due to baby in tummy)... Then
our school/playtime begins mixed with their bible verse learning
and TV and outside when weather permits and etc... The list continues
to grow and be altered due to my discipline getting more sharpened...
When I slack my schedule is sad, so I have to stick with it to
keep it happy :) :)


Somehow I became a follower of my own blog and can't undo that. Any ideas?

Monday, January 24, 2011

A ramble release :)

Today is a nice snow day. The sun is out and makes the snow
sparkle. It's not a day that the snow originally came, it's just a few days
after. The kids are napping. The air seems more refreshing to
breathe in these moments, a rest period before taking the little ones
on again. I imagine it seems lighter too because I'm writing. Releasing...
my inner thoughts manages to steal a little burden from time to time, if
I actually maintain a good healthy habit of it. That and a consistent
communication between my husband and I really keeps my soul content.
This morning I rose and exercised my spirit and fell back asleep. My
dreams seem more vivid, when I let the Word abide in me, even if I do fall
back to sleep in the morning waiting for kids to rise. I sometimes feel slothful
when I fall back to sleep, but I think about what is practical and needed for
my body. I don't fall back to sleep just because I want to, it's pregnancy and
my health, that I know is very important for my all to be fresh, to be a
good parent and wife. If I lack sleep I'm more prone to sickness and my mind
going.... ha... you laugh but it's true. I'm not obsessed about it. I do just
need to be mindful of my own needs and I'm learning how with balance :)
Never use to be so mindful, but the morning time with Christ has been issuing
in a hunger to achieve at being a normal human and it also starts cravings
for a blooming social life as well, thus exciting me to be in contact with other
humans more not just to make them feel better but to realize I need it too!
That's enough ramblings for now... more later :)

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Stay at home mom

No matter what others say, if you do it right, staying at home and raising children in a nurturing and a learning evoking  enviornment, you reap many benifits verses sending them to daycare or preschool.
My experience of being a mom at home, has been trying, but worth the time spent with my kids. I know their souls are being shaped day by day but what they take in and even by what they already have within them, so I do my best to pour water, on the seed in them, and help them bloom. It of course happens when I don't expect it, the growth. I love it. I see and hear them do things when I least expect it and it just tickles me. They are literally little trees growing timely before my eyes. I don't always see the growth, but definitely when looking back, I see much change. Change is good and refreshing:)